The Art of Edging

Unsure of what edging is, or how to incorporate edging into your sex life?


What is Edging?

Edging is a form of orgasm control which is a result of an extended period of arousal time without reaching an orgasm. Edging is an act of erotic denial because it entails intentionally delaying either your own or someone else’s orgasm. This denial of release happens multiple times before letting go and giving permission to reach sexual gratification through orgasm. Also known as surfing or the tie and tease method, edging is a great tool for increasing male ejaculate, prolonging intercourse and getting to know your own and your partner’s body. The average amount of times a person will almost have an orgasm before backing off and without ejaculating during edging is between three and five times. Although it takes a lot of self-awareness, open communication and practice to master the art of edging- once you get the hang of it, all of this prep work seems more than worthwhile, because edging results in intensified orgasms. Edging can be done either by yourself, or with a partner. However, it is most likely to be successful during masturbation or with a long term partner who knows all the ins and outs of your body, as opposed to with a causal hook up. edging

Practice Makes Perfect

Since edging takes a lot of self control and discipline, don’t be surprised if you have a few accidental orgasms along the way. This is totally normal and it is just a part of the learning process. Don’t let this discourage you from learning how to master the art of edging. Using kegels to control reaching the point of no return requires some trial and error, but again, this is typical and should not be an excuse to give up on edging. Try focusing on the base of the penis instead of the frenulum and head area, as there are less nerves in the base to set you or your partner off.
Edging is used in many sexual practices including BDSM and tantric yoga and is also commonly advised as a helpful technique for men who suffer from premature ejaculation and erectile dysfunctions. Using climax control condoms or desensitizing lubricant, like Pjur Superhuman Performance Spray at the beginning of your session can increase the time you get to spend in the pleasure zone. And, isn’t that what it’s all about? From personal experiences with edging, I can recommend to use a Durex Performax condom at the beginning of an edging session and switching over to a silicone lubricated condom, like the Caution Wear Classic when it is time for an orgasm to finally take place. For women, edging is a lot easier when vibrating stimulators are out of the picture, even while masturbating, because vibrators can cause orgasms to happen too quickly. If you ordinarily use a toy like the Colt Waterproof Silver Rod, simply use it without the vibrating switch turned on, until you have edged to a near orgasm a few times. Then, let her rip. Similarly, when you use a smooth condom like the Beyond Seven Sheerlon instead of the LifeStyles Fun Bumps textured condom on your man, this can prolong the time it will take you to reach an orgasm. Teasing the clitoris instead of applying direct stimulation is another great way to achieve edging with going over the top. Be sure to tell this to your partner if they are too eager or heavy handed.

About Condom Depot

The Condom Depot Learning Center provides free safer sex ed and has recently been resourced by Men's Health, Go Ask Alice, Her Campus, LifeHacker, Scarleteen, Bustle, Madame Noire, Jezebel, Vice, Stallion Style, aPlus, Sex Talk Tuesday and Adult Sex Ed Month.

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