January 2015 Reader Questions

Dearest readers, you’ve been welcoming in the new year with tons of safe sex. How do we know? From all the reader questions you’ve been submitting to us! January was our biggest month of questions thus far, which makes feel pretty optimistic. These were some of our favorites!

asknonlatex

I would really like to know what type of condoms you’re using, just so we can look up what type of lube is on them. Why? Well, it doesn’t sound like you have a latex allergy, especially if you’re still reacting in the same way to non-latex condoms.

Many condoms come with a water-based lube which can be an irritant, particularly if you already have sensitive skin. I have really bad eczema and when my skin isn’t in tip-top shape, water-based lubes can feel very abrasive or even dry me out. Both latex and non-latex condoms can come with a water-based lube.

It could also be a number of other things. Sometimes vaginas can be irritated by textured condoms (those with ribs or studs). Or, if you’re using spermicide, that’s a HUGE irritant (and quite frankly, should be off the market).

Have you been diagnosed with a latex allergy by a doctor? We’re talking a full blown blood or scratch test here. Have you tried non-lubricated condoms? Unfortunately, there is no non-lubricated, non-latex condom (yet), but that may be a good place to start.

If you want to try the non-lubricated route, you’ll still need some kind of lube. Check out a silicone-based lube, like my favorite body-friendly, super slippery WET Naturals Silky Supreme. Silicone-lube is considered hypoallergenic by the medical community, and is super body-safe. Just watch it on the toys, if you have any.

Also, check out this article on the best silicone-lubricated condoms. And if you’re really curious, as your doctor about getting an allergy screening done.

askflavored

That depends on what is flavoring the condom. The lubricants of many flavored condoms have glycerin in them, which is not vagina-friendly and can cause yeast infections. We usually just recommend staying away since it can be difficult to find accurate information. Keep some non-flavored ones on hand to switch to before going from oral to vaginal!

asksquirting

It’s a common misconception that a) every person with a vagina can squirt and b) every person with a vagina wants to squirt and c) there’s a certain magical button you can hit that just makes them gush. The truth is, there’s not just any one way for squirting to happen.

Orgasms without squirting are entirely possible, and for many, they are the norm and extremely satisfying. Some people just can’t do it and there’s nothing wrong with that. It’s just not how they orgasm.

Other people get embarrassed when they squirt, to the point where they don’t feel comfortable letting themselves squirt around their partner, or even letting their partner know they can (if they can). A certain level of intimacy may be required to work past this— and a lot of towels.

And sometimes people squirt from different things. One person might squirt from clitoral stimulation via oral, while another can only have it happen from a certain toy hitting their G-spot. Or sometimes, they even just have to be in the right headspace. Sometimes it happens from an act you’ve done a thousand times with no squirting and they can’t really explain or replicate it.

Read this article on the Secret to Female Squirting for some helpful tips, but also just relax and focus on giving your partner the best orgasm you can.

askchlorine

It sure is! But don’t believe the age-old myth that chlorine can prevent pregnancy or STDs. Check out our article on how to stay safe while having sex underwater.

askcold

If it was just one night, they might be alright. However, there’s no reason to risk it if you’re worried about it.

I wrote this article last year in regards to a similar question— it has some tips on how to test your condoms to make sure they’re still bang-worthy! Check it out, and never be afraid to buy something else instead. It’ll always be cheaper than an STD test or a pregnancy, and it will give you peace of mind.

askspermallergy

I’m guessing that you’re allergic to one of the ingredients listed in the article, like potassium, copper, or zinc. My first question is this: have you ingested sperm or come into contact with it before? And if so, did you have a reaction?

All three of those things are already present in the human body. It may that they’re in such a small amount that they won’t aggravate your allergy, or it may be for some other reason. But chances are, you’re probably just fine. After all, there is only a tiny amount of each of those things in ejaculate.

In fact, I have a male friend whose body still produces sperm, who has a potassium allergy. He may not be able to eat bananas or avocados, but he doesn’t have a serious allergic reaction every time he orgasms because it’s a tiny amount and it’s already inside his body.

Myself? I can’t wear copper jewelry without having an eczema outbreak, but that doesn’t mean I don’t have copper in my body. In fact, it’s essential to life as a human. Which I most definitely am. I swear.

If you’re having reactions to sperm, see an immunologist. If you think you might have a reaction to sperm but haven’t tried it yet, see an immunologist. If you just really nervous and want someone to soothe your concerns, talk to your immunologist. They can test for sperm allergies and come up with the best treatment for you.

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